Speeches (Lines) for Sir Toby Belch in "Twelfth Night; or, What You Will"

Total: 152
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# Act / Scene Speech text
1 I / 3
  • What a plague means my niece, to take the death of
    her brother thus? I am su...
  • What a plague means my niece, to take the death of
    her brother thus? I am sure care's an enemy to life.
  • Viola. I thank thee: lead me on.

    Sir Toby Belch. What a plague means my niece, to take the death of
    her brother thus? I am sure care's an enemy to life.

2 I / 3
  • Why, let her except, before excepted.
  • Why, let her except, before excepted.
  • Maria. By my troth, Sir Toby, you must come in earlier o'
    nights: your cousin, my lady, takes great
    exceptions to your ill hours.

    Sir Toby Belch. Why, let her except, before excepted.

3 I / 3
  • Confine! I'll confine myself no finer than I am:
    these clothes are good enou...
  • Confine! I'll confine myself no finer than I am:
    these clothes are good enough to drink in; and so be
    these boots too: an they be not, let them hang
    themselves in their own straps.
  • Maria. Ay, but you must confine yourself within the modest
    limits of order.

    Sir Toby Belch. Confine! I'll confine myself no finer than I am:
    these clothes are good enough to drink in; and so be
    these boots too: an they be not, let them hang
    themselves in their own straps.

4 I / 3
  • Who, Sir Andrew Aguecheek?
  • Who, Sir Andrew Aguecheek?
  • Maria. That quaffing and drinking will undo you: I heard
    my lady talk of it yesterday; and of a foolish
    knight that you brought in one night here to be her wooer.

    Sir Toby Belch. Who, Sir Andrew Aguecheek?

5 I / 3
  • He's as tall a man as any's in Illyria.
  • He's as tall a man as any's in Illyria.
  • Maria. Ay, he.

    Sir Toby Belch. He's as tall a man as any's in Illyria.

6 I / 3
  • Why, he has three thousand ducats a year.
  • Why, he has three thousand ducats a year.
  • Maria. What's that to the purpose?

    Sir Toby Belch. Why, he has three thousand ducats a year.

7 I / 3
  • Fie, that you'll say so! he plays o' the
    viol-de-gamboys, and speaks three o...
  • Fie, that you'll say so! he plays o' the
    viol-de-gamboys, and speaks three or four languages
    word for word without book, and hath all the good
    gifts of nature.
  • Maria. Ay, but he'll have but a year in all these ducats:
    he's a very fool and a prodigal.

    Sir Toby Belch. Fie, that you'll say so! he plays o' the
    viol-de-gamboys, and speaks three or four languages
    word for word without book, and hath all the good
    gifts of nature.

8 I / 3
  • By this hand, they are scoundrels and subtractors
    that say so of him. Who ar...
  • By this hand, they are scoundrels and subtractors
    that say so of him. Who are they?
  • Maria. He hath indeed, almost natural: for besides that
    he's a fool, he's a great quarreller: and but that
    he hath the gift of a coward to allay the gust he
    hath in quarrelling, 'tis thought among the prudent
    he would quickly have the gift of a grave.

    Sir Toby Belch. By this hand, they are scoundrels and subtractors
    that say so of him. Who are they?

9 I / 3
  • With drinking healths to my niece: I'll drink to
    her as long as there is a p...
  • With drinking healths to my niece: I'll drink to
    her as long as there is a passage in my throat and
    drink in Illyria: he's a coward and a coystrill
    that will not drink to my niece till his brains turn
    o' the toe like a parish-top. What, wench!
    Castiliano vulgo! for here comes Sir Andrew Agueface.
  • Maria. They that add, moreover, he's drunk nightly in your company.

    Sir Toby Belch. With drinking healths to my niece: I'll drink to
    her as long as there is a passage in my throat and
    drink in Illyria: he's a coward and a coystrill
    that will not drink to my niece till his brains turn
    o' the toe like a parish-top. What, wench!
    Castiliano vulgo! for here comes Sir Andrew Agueface.

10 I / 3
  • Sweet Sir Andrew!
  • Sweet Sir Andrew!
  • Sir Andrew Aguecheek. Sir Toby Belch! how now, Sir Toby Belch!

    Sir Toby Belch. Sweet Sir Andrew!

11 I / 3
  • Accost, Sir Andrew, accost.
  • Accost, Sir Andrew, accost.
  • Maria. And you too, sir.

    Sir Toby Belch. Accost, Sir Andrew, accost.

12 I / 3
  • My niece's chambermaid.
  • My niece's chambermaid.
  • Sir Andrew Aguecheek. What's that?

    Sir Toby Belch. My niece's chambermaid.

13 I / 3
  • You mistake, knight; 'accost' is front her, board
    her, woo her, assail her.
  • You mistake, knight; 'accost' is front her, board
    her, woo her, assail her.
  • Sir Andrew Aguecheek. Good Mistress Mary Accost,--

    Sir Toby Belch. You mistake, knight; 'accost' is front her, board
    her, woo her, assail her.

14 I / 3
  • An thou let part so, Sir Andrew, would thou mightst
    never draw sword again.
  • An thou let part so, Sir Andrew, would thou mightst
    never draw sword again.
  • Maria. Fare you well, gentlemen.

    Sir Toby Belch. An thou let part so, Sir Andrew, would thou mightst
    never draw sword again.

15 I / 3
  • O knight thou lackest a cup of canary: when did I
    see thee so put down?
  • O knight thou lackest a cup of canary: when did I
    see thee so put down?
  • Maria. Ay, sir, I have them at my fingers' ends: marry,
    now I let go your hand, I am barren.

    Sir Toby Belch. O knight thou lackest a cup of canary: when did I
    see thee so put down?

16 I / 3
  • No question.
  • No question.
  • Sir Andrew Aguecheek. Never in your life, I think; unless you see canary
    put me down. Methinks sometimes I have no more wit
    than a Christian or an ordinary man has: but I am a
    great eater of beef and I believe that does harm to my wit.

    Sir Toby Belch. No question.

17 I / 3
  • Pourquoi, my dear knight?
  • Pourquoi, my dear knight?
  • Sir Andrew Aguecheek. An I thought that, I'ld forswear it. I'll ride home
    to-morrow, Sir Toby.

    Sir Toby Belch. Pourquoi, my dear knight?

18 I / 3
  • Then hadst thou had an excellent head of hair.
  • Then hadst thou had an excellent head of hair.
  • Sir Andrew Aguecheek. What is 'Pourquoi'? do or not do? I would I had
    bestowed that time in the tongues that I have in
    fencing, dancing and bear-baiting: O, had I but
    followed the arts!

    Sir Toby Belch. Then hadst thou had an excellent head of hair.

19 I / 3
  • Past question; for thou seest it will not curl by nature.
  • Past question; for thou seest it will not curl by nature.
  • Sir Andrew Aguecheek. Why, would that have mended my hair?

    Sir Toby Belch. Past question; for thou seest it will not curl by nature.

20 I / 3
  • Excellent; it hangs like flax on a distaff; and I
    hope to see a housewife ta...
  • Excellent; it hangs like flax on a distaff; and I
    hope to see a housewife take thee between her legs
    and spin it off.
  • Sir Andrew Aguecheek. But it becomes me well enough, does't not?

    Sir Toby Belch. Excellent; it hangs like flax on a distaff; and I
    hope to see a housewife take thee between her legs
    and spin it off.

21 I / 3
  • She'll none o' the count: she'll not match above
    her degree, neither in esta...
  • She'll none o' the count: she'll not match above
    her degree, neither in estate, years, nor wit; I
    have heard her swear't. Tut, there's life in't,
    man.
  • Sir Andrew Aguecheek. Faith, I'll home to-morrow, Sir Toby: your niece
    will not be seen; or if she be, it's four to one
    she'll none of me: the count himself here hard by woos her.

    Sir Toby Belch. She'll none o' the count: she'll not match above
    her degree, neither in estate, years, nor wit; I
    have heard her swear't. Tut, there's life in't,
    man.

22 I / 3
  • Art thou good at these kickshawses, knight?
  • Art thou good at these kickshawses, knight?
  • Sir Andrew Aguecheek. I'll stay a month longer. I am a fellow o' the
    strangest mind i' the world; I delight in masques
    and revels sometimes altogether.

    Sir Toby Belch. Art thou good at these kickshawses, knight?

23 I / 3
  • What is thy excellence in a galliard, knight?
  • What is thy excellence in a galliard, knight?
  • Sir Andrew Aguecheek. As any man in Illyria, whatsoever he be, under the
    degree of my betters; and yet I will not compare
    with an old man.

    Sir Toby Belch. What is thy excellence in a galliard, knight?

24 I / 3
  • And I can cut the mutton to't.
  • And I can cut the mutton to't.
  • Sir Andrew Aguecheek. Faith, I can cut a caper.

    Sir Toby Belch. And I can cut the mutton to't.

25 I / 3
  • Wherefore are these things hid? wherefore have
    these gifts a curtain before...
  • Wherefore are these things hid? wherefore have
    these gifts a curtain before 'em? are they like to
    take dust, like Mistress Mall's picture? why dost
    thou not go to church in a galliard and come home in
    a coranto? My very walk should be a jig; I would not
    so much as make water but in a sink-a-pace. What
    dost thou mean? Is it a world to hide virtues in?
    I did think, by the excellent constitution of thy
    leg, it was formed under the star of a galliard.
  • Sir Andrew Aguecheek. And I think I have the back-trick simply as strong
    as any man in Illyria.

    Sir Toby Belch. Wherefore are these things hid? wherefore have
    these gifts a curtain before 'em? are they like to
    take dust, like Mistress Mall's picture? why dost
    thou not go to church in a galliard and come home in
    a coranto? My very walk should be a jig; I would not
    so much as make water but in a sink-a-pace. What
    dost thou mean? Is it a world to hide virtues in?
    I did think, by the excellent constitution of thy
    leg, it was formed under the star of a galliard.

26 I / 3
  • What shall we do else? were we not born under Taurus?
  • What shall we do else? were we not born under Taurus?
  • Sir Andrew Aguecheek. Ay, 'tis strong, and it does indifferent well in a
    flame-coloured stock. Shall we set about some revels?

    Sir Toby Belch. What shall we do else? were we not born under Taurus?

27 I / 3
  • No, sir; it is legs and thighs. Let me see the
    caper; ha! higher: ha, ha! ex...
  • No, sir; it is legs and thighs. Let me see the
    caper; ha! higher: ha, ha! excellent!
  • Sir Andrew Aguecheek. Taurus! That's sides and heart.

    Sir Toby Belch. No, sir; it is legs and thighs. Let me see the
    caper; ha! higher: ha, ha! excellent!

28 I / 5
  • A gentleman.
  • A gentleman.
  • Olivia. By mine honour, half drunk. What is he at the gate, cousin?

    Sir Toby Belch. A gentleman.

29 I / 5
  • 'Tis a gentle man here--a plague o' these
    pickle-herring! How now, sot!
  • 'Tis a gentle man here--a plague o' these
    pickle-herring! How now, sot!
  • Olivia. A gentleman! what gentleman?

    Sir Toby Belch. 'Tis a gentle man here--a plague o' these
    pickle-herring! How now, sot!

30 I / 5
  • Lechery! I defy lechery. There's one at the gate.
  • Lechery! I defy lechery. There's one at the gate.
  • Olivia. Cousin, cousin, how have you come so early by this lethargy?

    Sir Toby Belch. Lechery! I defy lechery. There's one at the gate.

31 I / 5
  • Let him be the devil, an he will, I care not: give
    me faith, say I. Well, it...
  • Let him be the devil, an he will, I care not: give
    me faith, say I. Well, it's all one.
  • Olivia. Ay, marry, what is he?

    Sir Toby Belch. Let him be the devil, an he will, I care not: give
    me faith, say I. Well, it's all one.

32 II / 3
  • Approach, Sir Andrew: not to be abed after
    midnight is to be up betimes; and...
  • Approach, Sir Andrew: not to be abed after
    midnight is to be up betimes; and 'diluculo
    surgere,' thou know'st,--
  • Viola. I left no ring with her: what means this lady?
    Fortune forbid my outside have not charm'd her!
    She made good view of me; indeed, so much,
    That sure methought her eyes had lost her tongue,
    For she did speak in starts distractedly.
    She loves me, sure; the cunning of her passion
    Invites me in this churlish messenger.
    None of my lord's ring! why, he sent her none.
    I am the man: if it be so, as 'tis,
    Poor lady, she were better love a dream.
    Disguise, I see, thou art a wickedness,
    Wherein the pregnant enemy does much.
    How easy is it for the proper-false
    In women's waxen hearts to set their forms!
    Alas, our frailty is the cause, not we!
    For such as we are made of, such we be.
    How will this fadge? my master loves her dearly;
    And I, poor monster, fond as much on him;
    And she, mistaken, seems to dote on me.
    What will become of this? As I am man,
    My state is desperate for my master's love;
    As I am woman,--now alas the day!--
    What thriftless sighs shall poor Olivia breathe!
    O time! thou must untangle this, not I;
    It is too hard a knot for me to untie!

    Sir Toby Belch. Approach, Sir Andrew: not to be abed after
    midnight is to be up betimes; and 'diluculo
    surgere,' thou know'st,--

33 II / 3
  • A false conclusion: I hate it as an unfilled can.
    To be up after midnight an...
  • A false conclusion: I hate it as an unfilled can.
    To be up after midnight and to go to bed then, is
    early: so that to go to bed after midnight is to go
    to bed betimes. Does not our life consist of the
    four elements?
  • Sir Andrew Aguecheek. Nay, my troth, I know not: but I know, to be up
    late is to be up late.

    Sir Toby Belch. A false conclusion: I hate it as an unfilled can.
    To be up after midnight and to go to bed then, is
    early: so that to go to bed after midnight is to go
    to bed betimes. Does not our life consist of the
    four elements?

34 II / 3
  • Thou'rt a scholar; let us therefore eat and drink.
    Marian, I say! a stoup of...
  • Thou'rt a scholar; let us therefore eat and drink.
    Marian, I say! a stoup of wine!
  • Sir Andrew Aguecheek. Faith, so they say; but I think it rather consists
    of eating and drinking.

    Sir Toby Belch. Thou'rt a scholar; let us therefore eat and drink.
    Marian, I say! a stoup of wine!

35 II / 3
  • Welcome, ass. Now let's have a catch.
  • Welcome, ass. Now let's have a catch.
  • Feste. How now, my hearts! did you never see the picture
    of 'we three'?

    Sir Toby Belch. Welcome, ass. Now let's have a catch.

36 II / 3
  • Come on; there is sixpence for you: let's have a song.
  • Come on; there is sixpence for you: let's have a song.
  • Sir Andrew Aguecheek. Excellent! why, this is the best fooling, when all
    is done. Now, a song.

    Sir Toby Belch. Come on; there is sixpence for you: let's have a song.

37 II / 3
  • A love-song, a love-song.
  • A love-song, a love-song.
  • Feste. Would you have a love-song, or a song of good life?

    Sir Toby Belch. A love-song, a love-song.

38 II / 3
  • Good, good.
  • Good, good.
  • Sir Andrew Aguecheek. Excellent good, i' faith.

    Sir Toby Belch. Good, good.

39 II / 3
  • A contagious breath.
  • A contagious breath.
  • Sir Andrew Aguecheek. A mellifluous voice, as I am true knight.

    Sir Toby Belch. A contagious breath.

40 II / 3
  • To hear by the nose, it is dulcet in contagion.
    But shall we make the welkin...
  • To hear by the nose, it is dulcet in contagion.
    But shall we make the welkin dance indeed? shall we
    rouse the night-owl in a catch that will draw three
    souls out of one weaver? shall we do that?
  • Sir Andrew Aguecheek. Very sweet and contagious, i' faith.

    Sir Toby Belch. To hear by the nose, it is dulcet in contagion.
    But shall we make the welkin dance indeed? shall we
    rouse the night-owl in a catch that will draw three
    souls out of one weaver? shall we do that?

41 II / 3
  • My lady's a Cataian, we are politicians, Malvolio's
    a Peg-a-Ramsey, and 'Thr...
  • My lady's a Cataian, we are politicians, Malvolio's
    a Peg-a-Ramsey, and 'Three merry men be we.' Am not
    I consanguineous? am I not of her blood?
    Tillyvally. Lady!
    [Sings]
    'There dwelt a man in Babylon, lady, lady!'
  • Maria. What a caterwauling do you keep here! If my lady
    have not called up her steward Malvolio and bid him
    turn you out of doors, never trust me.

    Sir Toby Belch. My lady's a Cataian, we are politicians, Malvolio's
    a Peg-a-Ramsey, and 'Three merry men be we.' Am not
    I consanguineous? am I not of her blood?
    Tillyvally. Lady!
    [Sings]
    'There dwelt a man in Babylon, lady, lady!'

42 II / 3
  • [Sings] 'O, the twelfth day of December,'--
  • [Sings] 'O, the twelfth day of December,'--
  • Sir Andrew Aguecheek. Ay, he does well enough if he be disposed, and so do
    I too: he does it with a better grace, but I do it
    more natural.

    Sir Toby Belch. [Sings] 'O, the twelfth day of December,'--

43 II / 3
  • We did keep time, sir, in our catches. Sneck up!
  • We did keep time, sir, in our catches. Sneck up!
  • Malvolio. My masters, are you mad? or what are you? Have ye
    no wit, manners, nor honesty, but to gabble like
    tinkers at this time of night? Do ye make an
    alehouse of my lady's house, that ye squeak out your
    coziers' catches without any mitigation or remorse
    of voice? Is there no respect of place, persons, nor
    time in you?

    Sir Toby Belch. We did keep time, sir, in our catches. Sneck up!

44 II / 3
  • 'Farewell, dear heart, since I must needs be gone.'
  • 'Farewell, dear heart, since I must needs be gone.'
  • Malvolio. Sir Toby, I must be round with you. My lady bade me
    tell you, that, though she harbours you as her
    kinsman, she's nothing allied to your disorders. If
    you can separate yourself and your misdemeanors, you
    are welcome to the house; if not, an it would please
    you to take leave of her, she is very willing to bid
    you farewell.

    Sir Toby Belch. 'Farewell, dear heart, since I must needs be gone.'

45 II / 3
  • 'But I will never die.'
  • 'But I will never die.'
  • Malvolio. Is't even so?

    Sir Toby Belch. 'But I will never die.'

46 II / 3
  • 'Shall I bid him go?'
  • 'Shall I bid him go?'
  • Malvolio. This is much credit to you.

    Sir Toby Belch. 'Shall I bid him go?'

47 II / 3
  • 'Shall I bid him go, and spare not?'
  • 'Shall I bid him go, and spare not?'
  • Feste. 'What an if you do?'

    Sir Toby Belch. 'Shall I bid him go, and spare not?'

48 II / 3
  • Out o' tune, sir: ye lie. Art any more than a
    steward? Dost thou think, beca...
  • Out o' tune, sir: ye lie. Art any more than a
    steward? Dost thou think, because thou art
    virtuous, there shall be no more cakes and ale?
  • Feste. 'O no, no, no, no, you dare not.'

    Sir Toby Belch. Out o' tune, sir: ye lie. Art any more than a
    steward? Dost thou think, because thou art
    virtuous, there shall be no more cakes and ale?

49 II / 3
  • Thou'rt i' the right. Go, sir, rub your chain with
    crumbs. A stoup of wine,...
  • Thou'rt i' the right. Go, sir, rub your chain with
    crumbs. A stoup of wine, Maria!
  • Feste. Yes, by Saint Anne, and ginger shall be hot i' the
    mouth too.

    Sir Toby Belch. Thou'rt i' the right. Go, sir, rub your chain with
    crumbs. A stoup of wine, Maria!

50 II / 3
  • Do't, knight: I'll write thee a challenge: or I'll
    deliver thy indignation t...
  • Do't, knight: I'll write thee a challenge: or I'll
    deliver thy indignation to him by word of mouth.
  • Sir Andrew Aguecheek. 'Twere as good a deed as to drink when a man's
    a-hungry, to challenge him the field, and then to
    break promise with him and make a fool of him.

    Sir Toby Belch. Do't, knight: I'll write thee a challenge: or I'll
    deliver thy indignation to him by word of mouth.

51 II / 3
  • Possess us, possess us; tell us something of him.
  • Possess us, possess us; tell us something of him.
  • Maria. Sweet Sir Toby, be patient for tonight: since the
    youth of the count's was today with thy lady, she is
    much out of quiet. For Monsieur Malvolio, let me
    alone with him: if I do not gull him into a
    nayword, and make him a common recreation, do not
    think I have wit enough to lie straight in my bed:
    I know I can do it.

    Sir Toby Belch. Possess us, possess us; tell us something of him.

52 II / 3
  • What, for being a puritan? thy exquisite reason,
    dear knight?
  • What, for being a puritan? thy exquisite reason,
    dear knight?
  • Sir Andrew Aguecheek. O, if I thought that I'ld beat him like a dog!

    Sir Toby Belch. What, for being a puritan? thy exquisite reason,
    dear knight?

53 II / 3
  • What wilt thou do?
  • What wilt thou do?
  • Maria. The devil a puritan that he is, or any thing
    constantly, but a time-pleaser; an affectioned ass,
    that cons state without book and utters it by great
    swarths: the best persuaded of himself, so
    crammed, as he thinks, with excellencies, that it is
    his grounds of faith that all that look on him love
    him; and on that vice in him will my revenge find
    notable cause to work.

    Sir Toby Belch. What wilt thou do?

54 II / 3
  • Excellent! I smell a device.
  • Excellent! I smell a device.
  • Maria. I will drop in his way some obscure epistles of
    love; wherein, by the colour of his beard, the shape
    of his leg, the manner of his gait, the expressure
    of his eye, forehead, and complexion, he shall find
    himself most feelingly personated. I can write very
    like my lady your niece: on a forgotten matter we
    can hardly make distinction of our hands.

    Sir Toby Belch. Excellent! I smell a device.

55 II / 3
  • He shall think, by the letters that thou wilt drop,
    that they come from my n...
  • He shall think, by the letters that thou wilt drop,
    that they come from my niece, and that she's in
    love with him.
  • Sir Andrew Aguecheek. I have't in my nose too.

    Sir Toby Belch. He shall think, by the letters that thou wilt drop,
    that they come from my niece, and that she's in
    love with him.

56 II / 3
  • Good night, Penthesilea.
  • Good night, Penthesilea.
  • Maria. Sport royal, I warrant you: I know my physic will
    work with him. I will plant you two, and let the
    fool make a third, where he shall find the letter:
    observe his construction of it. For this night, to
    bed, and dream on the event. Farewell.

    Sir Toby Belch. Good night, Penthesilea.

57 II / 3
  • She's a beagle, true-bred, and one that adores me:
    what o' that?
  • She's a beagle, true-bred, and one that adores me:
    what o' that?
  • Sir Andrew Aguecheek. Before me, she's a good wench.

    Sir Toby Belch. She's a beagle, true-bred, and one that adores me:
    what o' that?

58 II / 3
  • Let's to bed, knight. Thou hadst need send for
    more money.
  • Let's to bed, knight. Thou hadst need send for
    more money.
  • Sir Andrew Aguecheek. I was adored once too.

    Sir Toby Belch. Let's to bed, knight. Thou hadst need send for
    more money.

59 II / 3
  • Send for money, knight: if thou hast her not i'
    the end, call me cut.
  • Send for money, knight: if thou hast her not i'
    the end, call me cut.
  • Sir Andrew Aguecheek. If I cannot recover your niece, I am a foul way out.

    Sir Toby Belch. Send for money, knight: if thou hast her not i'
    the end, call me cut.

60 II / 3
  • Come, come, I'll go burn some sack; 'tis too late
    to go to bed now: come, kn...
  • Come, come, I'll go burn some sack; 'tis too late
    to go to bed now: come, knight; come, knight.
  • Sir Andrew Aguecheek. If I do not, never trust me, take it how you will.

    Sir Toby Belch. Come, come, I'll go burn some sack; 'tis too late
    to go to bed now: come, knight; come, knight.

61 II / 5
  • Come thy ways, Signior Fabian.
  • Come thy ways, Signior Fabian.
  • Orsino. Ay, that's the theme.
    To her in haste; give her this jewel; say,
    My love can give no place, bide no denay.

    Sir Toby Belch. Come thy ways, Signior Fabian.

62 II / 5
  • Wouldst thou not be glad to have the niggardly
    rascally sheep-biter come by...
  • Wouldst thou not be glad to have the niggardly
    rascally sheep-biter come by some notable shame?
  • Fabian. Nay, I'll come: if I lose a scruple of this sport,
    let me be boiled to death with melancholy.

    Sir Toby Belch. Wouldst thou not be glad to have the niggardly
    rascally sheep-biter come by some notable shame?

63 II / 5
  • To anger him we'll have the bear again; and we will
    fool him black and blue:...
  • To anger him we'll have the bear again; and we will
    fool him black and blue: shall we not, Sir Andrew?
  • Fabian. I would exult, man: you know, he brought me out o'
    favour with my lady about a bear-baiting here.

    Sir Toby Belch. To anger him we'll have the bear again; and we will
    fool him black and blue: shall we not, Sir Andrew?

64 II / 5
  • Here comes the little villain.
    [Enter MARIA]
    How now, my metal of India!...
  • Here comes the little villain.
    [Enter MARIA]
    How now, my metal of India!
  • Sir Andrew Aguecheek. An we do not, it is pity of our lives.

    Sir Toby Belch. Here comes the little villain.
    [Enter MARIA]
    How now, my metal of India!

65 II / 5
  • Here's an overweening rogue!
  • Here's an overweening rogue!
  • Malvolio. 'Tis but fortune; all is fortune. Maria once told
    me she did affect me: and I have heard herself come
    thus near, that, should she fancy, it should be one
    of my complexion. Besides, she uses me with a more
    exalted respect than any one else that follows her.
    What should I think on't?

    Sir Toby Belch. Here's an overweening rogue!

66 II / 5
  • Peace, I say.
  • Peace, I say.
  • Sir Andrew Aguecheek. 'Slight, I could so beat the rogue!

    Sir Toby Belch. Peace, I say.

67 II / 5
  • Ah, rogue!
  • Ah, rogue!
  • Malvolio. To be Count Malvolio!

    Sir Toby Belch. Ah, rogue!

68 II / 5
  • Peace, peace!
  • Peace, peace!
  • Sir Andrew Aguecheek. Pistol him, pistol him.

    Sir Toby Belch. Peace, peace!

69 II / 5
  • O, for a stone-bow, to hit him in the eye!
  • O, for a stone-bow, to hit him in the eye!
  • Malvolio. Having been three months married to her, sitting in
    my state,--

    Sir Toby Belch. O, for a stone-bow, to hit him in the eye!

70 II / 5
  • Fire and brimstone!
  • Fire and brimstone!
  • Malvolio. Calling my officers about me, in my branched velvet
    gown; having come from a day-bed, where I have left
    Olivia sleeping,--

    Sir Toby Belch. Fire and brimstone!

71 II / 5
  • Bolts and shackles!
  • Bolts and shackles!
  • Malvolio. And then to have the humour of state; and after a
    demure travel of regard, telling them I know my
    place as I would they should do theirs, to for my
    kinsman Toby,--

    Sir Toby Belch. Bolts and shackles!

72 II / 5
  • Shall this fellow live?
  • Shall this fellow live?
  • Malvolio. Seven of my people, with an obedient start, make
    out for him: I frown the while; and perchance wind
    up watch, or play with my--some rich jewel. Toby
    approaches; courtesies there to me,--

    Sir Toby Belch. Shall this fellow live?

73 II / 5
  • And does not Toby take you a blow o' the lips then?
  • And does not Toby take you a blow o' the lips then?
  • Malvolio. I extend my hand to him thus, quenching my familiar
    smile with an austere regard of control,--

    Sir Toby Belch. And does not Toby take you a blow o' the lips then?

74 II / 5
  • What, what?
  • What, what?
  • Malvolio. Saying, 'Cousin Toby, my fortunes having cast me on
    your niece give me this prerogative of speech,'--

    Sir Toby Belch. What, what?

75 II / 5
  • Out, scab!
  • Out, scab!
  • Malvolio. 'You must amend your drunkenness.'

    Sir Toby Belch. Out, scab!

76 II / 5
  • O, peace! and the spirit of humour intimate reading
    aloud to him!
  • O, peace! and the spirit of humour intimate reading
    aloud to him!
  • Fabian. Now is the woodcock near the gin.

    Sir Toby Belch. O, peace! and the spirit of humour intimate reading
    aloud to him!

77 II / 5
  • Marry, hang thee, brock!
  • Marry, hang thee, brock!
  • Malvolio. [Reads]
    Jove knows I love: But who?
    Lips, do not move;
    No man must know.
    'No man must know.' What follows? the numbers
    altered! 'No man must know:' if this should be
    thee, Malvolio?

    Sir Toby Belch. Marry, hang thee, brock!

78 II / 5
  • Excellent wench, say I.
  • Excellent wench, say I.
  • Fabian. A fustian riddle!

    Sir Toby Belch. Excellent wench, say I.

79 II / 5
  • And with what wing the staniel cheques at it!
  • And with what wing the staniel cheques at it!
  • Fabian. What dish o' poison has she dressed him!

    Sir Toby Belch. And with what wing the staniel cheques at it!

80 II / 5
  • O, ay, make up that: he is now at a cold scent.
  • O, ay, make up that: he is now at a cold scent.
  • Malvolio. 'I may command where I adore.' Why, she may command
    me: I serve her; she is my lady. Why, this is
    evident to any formal capacity; there is no
    obstruction in this: and the end,--what should
    that alphabetical position portend? If I could make
    that resemble something in me,--Softly! M, O, A,
    I,--

    Sir Toby Belch. O, ay, make up that: he is now at a cold scent.

81 II / 5
  • Ay, or I'll cudgel him, and make him cry O!
  • Ay, or I'll cudgel him, and make him cry O!
  • Fabian. And O shall end, I hope.

    Sir Toby Belch. Ay, or I'll cudgel him, and make him cry O!

82 II / 5
  • I could marry this wench for this device.
  • I could marry this wench for this device.
  • Fabian. I will not give my part of this sport for a pension
    of thousands to be paid from the Sophy.

    Sir Toby Belch. I could marry this wench for this device.

83 II / 5
  • And ask no other dowry with her but such another jest.
  • And ask no other dowry with her but such another jest.
  • Sir Andrew Aguecheek. So could I too.

    Sir Toby Belch. And ask no other dowry with her but such another jest.

84 II / 5
  • Wilt thou set thy foot o' my neck?
  • Wilt thou set thy foot o' my neck?
  • Fabian. Here comes my noble gull-catcher.

    Sir Toby Belch. Wilt thou set thy foot o' my neck?

85 II / 5
  • Shall I play my freedom at traytrip, and become thy
    bond-slave?
  • Shall I play my freedom at traytrip, and become thy
    bond-slave?
  • Sir Andrew Aguecheek. Or o' mine either?

    Sir Toby Belch. Shall I play my freedom at traytrip, and become thy
    bond-slave?

86 II / 5
  • Why, thou hast put him in such a dream, that when
    the image of it leaves him...
  • Why, thou hast put him in such a dream, that when
    the image of it leaves him he must run mad.
  • Sir Andrew Aguecheek. I' faith, or I either?

    Sir Toby Belch. Why, thou hast put him in such a dream, that when
    the image of it leaves him he must run mad.

87 II / 5
  • Like aqua-vitae with a midwife.
  • Like aqua-vitae with a midwife.
  • Maria. Nay, but say true; does it work upon him?

    Sir Toby Belch. Like aqua-vitae with a midwife.

88 II / 5
  • To the gates of Tartar, thou most excellent devil of wit!
  • To the gates of Tartar, thou most excellent devil of wit!
  • Maria. If you will then see the fruits of the sport, mark
    his first approach before my lady: he will come to
    her in yellow stockings, and 'tis a colour she
    abhors, and cross-gartered, a fashion she detests;
    and he will smile upon her, which will now be so
    unsuitable to her disposition, being addicted to a
    melancholy as she is, that it cannot but turn him
    into a notable contempt. If you will see it, follow
    me.

    Sir Toby Belch. To the gates of Tartar, thou most excellent devil of wit!

89 III / 1
  • Save you, gentleman.
  • Save you, gentleman.
  • Viola. This fellow is wise enough to play the fool;
    And to do that well craves a kind of wit:
    He must observe their mood on whom he jests,
    The quality of persons, and the time,
    And, like the haggard, cheque at every feather
    That comes before his eye. This is a practise
    As full of labour as a wise man's art
    For folly that he wisely shows is fit;
    But wise men, folly-fall'n, quite taint their wit.

    Sir Toby Belch. Save you, gentleman.

90 III / 1
  • Will you encounter the house? my niece is desirous
    you should enter, if your...
  • Will you encounter the house? my niece is desirous
    you should enter, if your trade be to her.
  • Sir Andrew Aguecheek. I hope, sir, you are; and I am yours.

    Sir Toby Belch. Will you encounter the house? my niece is desirous
    you should enter, if your trade be to her.

91 III / 1
  • Taste your legs, sir; put them to motion.
  • Taste your legs, sir; put them to motion.
  • Viola. I am bound to your niece, sir; I mean, she is the
    list of my voyage.

    Sir Toby Belch. Taste your legs, sir; put them to motion.

92 III / 1
  • I mean, to go, sir, to enter.
  • I mean, to go, sir, to enter.
  • Viola. My legs do better understand me, sir, than I
    understand what you mean by bidding me taste my legs.

    Sir Toby Belch. I mean, to go, sir, to enter.

93 III / 2
  • Thy reason, dear venom, give thy reason.
  • Thy reason, dear venom, give thy reason.
  • Sir Andrew Aguecheek. No, faith, I'll not stay a jot longer.

    Sir Toby Belch. Thy reason, dear venom, give thy reason.

94 III / 2
  • Did she see thee the while, old boy? tell me that.
  • Did she see thee the while, old boy? tell me that.
  • Sir Andrew Aguecheek. Marry, I saw your niece do more favours to the
    count's serving-man than ever she bestowed upon me;
    I saw't i' the orchard.

    Sir Toby Belch. Did she see thee the while, old boy? tell me that.

95 III / 2
  • And they have been grand-jury-men since before Noah
    was a sailor.
  • And they have been grand-jury-men since before Noah
    was a sailor.
  • Fabian. I will prove it legitimate, sir, upon the oaths of
    judgment and reason.

    Sir Toby Belch. And they have been grand-jury-men since before Noah
    was a sailor.

96 III / 2
  • Why, then, build me thy fortunes upon the basis of
    valour. Challenge me the...
  • Why, then, build me thy fortunes upon the basis of
    valour. Challenge me the count's youth to fight
    with him; hurt him in eleven places: my niece shall
    take note of it; and assure thyself, there is no
    love-broker in the world can more prevail in man's
    commendation with woman than report of valour.
  • Sir Andrew Aguecheek. An't be any way, it must be with valour; for policy
    I hate: I had as lief be a Brownist as a
    politician.

    Sir Toby Belch. Why, then, build me thy fortunes upon the basis of
    valour. Challenge me the count's youth to fight
    with him; hurt him in eleven places: my niece shall
    take note of it; and assure thyself, there is no
    love-broker in the world can more prevail in man's
    commendation with woman than report of valour.

97 III / 2
  • Go, write it in a martial hand; be curst and brief;
    it is no matter how witt...
  • Go, write it in a martial hand; be curst and brief;
    it is no matter how witty, so it be eloquent and fun
    of invention: taunt him with the licence of ink:
    if thou thou'st him some thrice, it shall not be
    amiss; and as many lies as will lie in thy sheet of
    paper, although the sheet were big enough for the
    bed of Ware in England, set 'em down: go, about it.
    Let there be gall enough in thy ink, though thou
    write with a goose-pen, no matter: about it.
  • Sir Andrew Aguecheek. Will either of you bear me a challenge to him?

    Sir Toby Belch. Go, write it in a martial hand; be curst and brief;
    it is no matter how witty, so it be eloquent and fun
    of invention: taunt him with the licence of ink:
    if thou thou'st him some thrice, it shall not be
    amiss; and as many lies as will lie in thy sheet of
    paper, although the sheet were big enough for the
    bed of Ware in England, set 'em down: go, about it.
    Let there be gall enough in thy ink, though thou
    write with a goose-pen, no matter: about it.

98 III / 2
  • We'll call thee at the cubiculo: go.
  • We'll call thee at the cubiculo: go.
  • Sir Andrew Aguecheek. Where shall I find you?

    Sir Toby Belch. We'll call thee at the cubiculo: go.

99 III / 2
  • I have been dear to him, lad, some two thousand
    strong, or so.
  • I have been dear to him, lad, some two thousand
    strong, or so.
  • Fabian. This is a dear manikin to you, Sir Toby.

    Sir Toby Belch. I have been dear to him, lad, some two thousand
    strong, or so.

100 III / 2
  • Never trust me, then; and by all means stir on the
    youth to an answer. I thi...
  • Never trust me, then; and by all means stir on the
    youth to an answer. I think oxen and wainropes
    cannot hale them together. For Andrew, if he were
    opened, and you find so much blood in his liver as
    will clog the foot of a flea, I'll eat the rest of
    the anatomy.
  • Fabian. We shall have a rare letter from him: but you'll
    not deliver't?

    Sir Toby Belch. Never trust me, then; and by all means stir on the
    youth to an answer. I think oxen and wainropes
    cannot hale them together. For Andrew, if he were
    opened, and you find so much blood in his liver as
    will clog the foot of a flea, I'll eat the rest of
    the anatomy.

101 III / 2
  • Look, where the youngest wren of nine comes.
  • Look, where the youngest wren of nine comes.
  • Fabian. And his opposite, the youth, bears in his visage no
    great presage of cruelty.

    Sir Toby Belch. Look, where the youngest wren of nine comes.

102 III / 2
  • And cross-gartered?
  • And cross-gartered?
  • Maria. If you desire the spleen, and will laugh yourself
    into stitches, follow me. Yond gull Malvolio is
    turned heathen, a very renegado; for there is no
    Christian, that means to be saved by believing
    rightly, can ever believe such impossible passages
    of grossness. He's in yellow stockings.

    Sir Toby Belch. And cross-gartered?

103 III / 2
  • Come, bring us, bring us where he is.
  • Come, bring us, bring us where he is.
  • Maria. Most villanously; like a pedant that keeps a school
    i' the church. I have dogged him, like his
    murderer. He does obey every point of the letter
    that I dropped to betray him: he does smile his
    face into more lines than is in the new map with the
    augmentation of the Indies: you have not seen such
    a thing as 'tis. I can hardly forbear hurling things
    at him. I know my lady will strike him: if she do,
    he'll smile and take't for a great favour.

    Sir Toby Belch. Come, bring us, bring us where he is.

104 III / 4
  • Which way is he, in the name of sanctity? If all
    the devils of hell be drawn...
  • Which way is he, in the name of sanctity? If all
    the devils of hell be drawn in little, and Legion
    himself possessed him, yet I'll speak to him.
  • Malvolio. O, ho! do you come near me now? no worse man than
    Sir Toby to look to me! This concurs directly with
    the letter: she sends him on purpose, that I may
    appear stubborn to him; for she incites me to that
    in the letter. 'Cast thy humble slough,' says she;
    'be opposite with a kinsman, surly with servants;
    let thy tongue tang with arguments of state; put
    thyself into the trick of singularity;' and
    consequently sets down the manner how; as, a sad
    face, a reverend carriage, a slow tongue, in the
    habit of some sir of note, and so forth. I have
    limed her; but it is Jove's doing, and Jove make me
    thankful! And when she went away now, 'Let this
    fellow be looked to:' fellow! not Malvolio, nor
    after my degree, but fellow. Why, every thing
    adheres together, that no dram of a scruple, no
    scruple of a scruple, no obstacle, no incredulous
    or unsafe circumstance--What can be said? Nothing
    that can be can come between me and the full
    prospect of my hopes. Well, Jove, not I, is the
    doer of this, and he is to be thanked.

    Sir Toby Belch. Which way is he, in the name of sanctity? If all
    the devils of hell be drawn in little, and Legion
    himself possessed him, yet I'll speak to him.

105 III / 4
  • Go to, go to; peace, peace; we must deal gently
    with him: let me alone. How...
  • Go to, go to; peace, peace; we must deal gently
    with him: let me alone. How do you, Malvolio? how
    is't with you? What, man! defy the devil:
    consider, he's an enemy to mankind.
  • Malvolio. Ah, ha! does she so?

    Sir Toby Belch. Go to, go to; peace, peace; we must deal gently
    with him: let me alone. How do you, Malvolio? how
    is't with you? What, man! defy the devil:
    consider, he's an enemy to mankind.

106 III / 4
  • Prithee, hold thy peace; this is not the way: do
    you not see you move him? l...
  • Prithee, hold thy peace; this is not the way: do
    you not see you move him? let me alone with him.
  • Maria. O Lord!

    Sir Toby Belch. Prithee, hold thy peace; this is not the way: do
    you not see you move him? let me alone with him.

107 III / 4
  • Why, how now, my bawcock! how dost thou, chuck?
  • Why, how now, my bawcock! how dost thou, chuck?
  • Fabian. No way but gentleness; gently, gently: the fiend is
    rough, and will not be roughly used.

    Sir Toby Belch. Why, how now, my bawcock! how dost thou, chuck?

108 III / 4
  • Ay, Biddy, come with me. What, man! 'tis not for
    gravity to play at cherry-p...
  • Ay, Biddy, come with me. What, man! 'tis not for
    gravity to play at cherry-pit with Satan: hang
    him, foul collier!
  • Malvolio. Sir!

    Sir Toby Belch. Ay, Biddy, come with me. What, man! 'tis not for
    gravity to play at cherry-pit with Satan: hang
    him, foul collier!

109 III / 4
  • Is't possible?
  • Is't possible?
  • Malvolio. Go, hang yourselves all! you are idle shallow
    things: I am not of your element: you shall know
    more hereafter.

    Sir Toby Belch. Is't possible?

110 III / 4
  • His very genius hath taken the infection of the device, man.
  • His very genius hath taken the infection of the device, man.
  • Fabian. If this were played upon a stage now, I could
    condemn it as an improbable fiction.

    Sir Toby Belch. His very genius hath taken the infection of the device, man.

111 III / 4
  • Come, we'll have him in a dark room and bound. My
    niece is already in the be...
  • Come, we'll have him in a dark room and bound. My
    niece is already in the belief that he's mad: we
    may carry it thus, for our pleasure and his penance,
    till our very pastime, tired out of breath, prompt
    us to have mercy on him: at which time we will
    bring the device to the bar and crown thee for a
    finder of madmen. But see, but see.
  • Maria. The house will be the quieter.

    Sir Toby Belch. Come, we'll have him in a dark room and bound. My
    niece is already in the belief that he's mad: we
    may carry it thus, for our pleasure and his penance,
    till our very pastime, tired out of breath, prompt
    us to have mercy on him: at which time we will
    bring the device to the bar and crown thee for a
    finder of madmen. But see, but see.

112 III / 4
  • Give me.
    [Reads]
    'Youth, whatsoever thou art, thou art but a scurvy fell...
  • Give me.
    [Reads]
    'Youth, whatsoever thou art, thou art but a scurvy fellow.'
  • Sir Andrew Aguecheek. Ay, is't, I warrant him: do but read.

    Sir Toby Belch. Give me.
    [Reads]
    'Youth, whatsoever thou art, thou art but a scurvy fellow.'

113 III / 4
  • [Reads] 'Wonder not, nor admire not in thy mind,
    why I do call thee so, for...
  • [Reads] 'Wonder not, nor admire not in thy mind,
    why I do call thee so, for I will show thee no reason for't.'
  • Fabian. Good, and valiant.

    Sir Toby Belch. [Reads] 'Wonder not, nor admire not in thy mind,
    why I do call thee so, for I will show thee no reason for't.'

114 III / 4
  • [Reads] 'Thou comest to the lady Olivia, and in my
    sight she uses thee kindl...
  • [Reads] 'Thou comest to the lady Olivia, and in my
    sight she uses thee kindly: but thou liest in thy
    throat; that is not the matter I challenge thee for.'
  • Fabian. A good note; that keeps you from the blow of the law.

    Sir Toby Belch. [Reads] 'Thou comest to the lady Olivia, and in my
    sight she uses thee kindly: but thou liest in thy
    throat; that is not the matter I challenge thee for.'

115 III / 4
  • [Reads] 'I will waylay thee going home; where if it
    be thy chance to kill me...
  • [Reads] 'I will waylay thee going home; where if it
    be thy chance to kill me,'--
  • Fabian. Very brief, and to exceeding good sense--less.

    Sir Toby Belch. [Reads] 'I will waylay thee going home; where if it
    be thy chance to kill me,'--

116 III / 4
  • [Reads] 'Thou killest me like a rogue and a villain.'
  • [Reads] 'Thou killest me like a rogue and a villain.'
  • Fabian. Good.

    Sir Toby Belch. [Reads] 'Thou killest me like a rogue and a villain.'

117 III / 4
  • [Reads] 'Fare thee well; and God have mercy upon
    one of our souls! He may ha...
  • [Reads] 'Fare thee well; and God have mercy upon
    one of our souls! He may have mercy upon mine; but
    my hope is better, and so look to thyself. Thy
    friend, as thou usest him, and thy sworn enemy,
    ANDREW AGUECHEEK.
    If this letter move him not, his legs cannot:
    I'll give't him.
  • Fabian. Still you keep o' the windy side of the law: good.

    Sir Toby Belch. [Reads] 'Fare thee well; and God have mercy upon
    one of our souls! He may have mercy upon mine; but
    my hope is better, and so look to thyself. Thy
    friend, as thou usest him, and thy sworn enemy,
    ANDREW AGUECHEEK.
    If this letter move him not, his legs cannot:
    I'll give't him.

118 III / 4
  • Go, Sir Andrew: scout me for him at the corner the
    orchard like a bum-baily:...
  • Go, Sir Andrew: scout me for him at the corner the
    orchard like a bum-baily: so soon as ever thou seest
    him, draw; and, as thou drawest swear horrible; for
    it comes to pass oft that a terrible oath, with a
    swaggering accent sharply twanged off, gives manhood
    more approbation than ever proof itself would have
    earned him. Away!
  • Maria. You may have very fit occasion for't: he is now in
    some commerce with my lady, and will by and by depart.

    Sir Toby Belch. Go, Sir Andrew: scout me for him at the corner the
    orchard like a bum-baily: so soon as ever thou seest
    him, draw; and, as thou drawest swear horrible; for
    it comes to pass oft that a terrible oath, with a
    swaggering accent sharply twanged off, gives manhood
    more approbation than ever proof itself would have
    earned him. Away!

119 III / 4
  • Now will not I deliver his letter: for the behavior
    of the young gentleman g...
  • Now will not I deliver his letter: for the behavior
    of the young gentleman gives him out to be of good
    capacity and breeding; his employment between his
    lord and my niece confirms no less: therefore this
    letter, being so excellently ignorant, will breed no
    terror in the youth: he will find it comes from a
    clodpole. But, sir, I will deliver his challenge by
    word of mouth; set upon Aguecheek a notable report
    of valour; and drive the gentleman, as I know his
    youth will aptly receive it, into a most hideous
    opinion of his rage, skill, fury and impetuosity.
    This will so fright them both that they will kill
    one another by the look, like cockatrices.
  • Sir Andrew Aguecheek. Nay, let me alone for swearing.

    Sir Toby Belch. Now will not I deliver his letter: for the behavior
    of the young gentleman gives him out to be of good
    capacity and breeding; his employment between his
    lord and my niece confirms no less: therefore this
    letter, being so excellently ignorant, will breed no
    terror in the youth: he will find it comes from a
    clodpole. But, sir, I will deliver his challenge by
    word of mouth; set upon Aguecheek a notable report
    of valour; and drive the gentleman, as I know his
    youth will aptly receive it, into a most hideous
    opinion of his rage, skill, fury and impetuosity.
    This will so fright them both that they will kill
    one another by the look, like cockatrices.

120 III / 4
  • I will meditate the while upon some horrid message
    for a challenge.
  • I will meditate the while upon some horrid message
    for a challenge.
  • Fabian. Here he comes with your niece: give them way till
    he take leave, and presently after him.

    Sir Toby Belch. I will meditate the while upon some horrid message
    for a challenge.

121 III / 4
  • Gentleman, God save thee.
  • Gentleman, God save thee.
  • Olivia. Well, come again to-morrow: fare thee well:
    A fiend like thee might bear my soul to hell.

    Sir Toby Belch. Gentleman, God save thee.

122 III / 4
  • That defence thou hast, betake thee to't: of what
    nature the wrongs are thou...
  • That defence thou hast, betake thee to't: of what
    nature the wrongs are thou hast done him, I know
    not; but thy intercepter, full of despite, bloody as
    the hunter, attends thee at the orchard-end:
    dismount thy tuck, be yare in thy preparation, for
    thy assailant is quick, skilful and deadly.
  • Viola. And you, sir.

    Sir Toby Belch. That defence thou hast, betake thee to't: of what
    nature the wrongs are thou hast done him, I know
    not; but thy intercepter, full of despite, bloody as
    the hunter, attends thee at the orchard-end:
    dismount thy tuck, be yare in thy preparation, for
    thy assailant is quick, skilful and deadly.

123 III / 4
  • You'll find it otherwise, I assure you: therefore,
    if you hold your life at...
  • You'll find it otherwise, I assure you: therefore,
    if you hold your life at any price, betake you to
    your guard; for your opposite hath in him what
    youth, strength, skill and wrath can furnish man withal.
  • Viola. You mistake, sir; I am sure no man hath any quarrel
    to me: my remembrance is very free and clear from
    any image of offence done to any man.

    Sir Toby Belch. You'll find it otherwise, I assure you: therefore,
    if you hold your life at any price, betake you to
    your guard; for your opposite hath in him what
    youth, strength, skill and wrath can furnish man withal.

124 III / 4
  • He is knight, dubbed with unhatched rapier and on
    carpet consideration; but...
  • He is knight, dubbed with unhatched rapier and on
    carpet consideration; but he is a devil in private
    brawl: souls and bodies hath he divorced three; and
    his incensement at this moment is so implacable,
    that satisfaction can be none but by pangs of death
    and sepulchre. Hob, nob, is his word; give't or take't.
  • Viola. I pray you, sir, what is he?

    Sir Toby Belch. He is knight, dubbed with unhatched rapier and on
    carpet consideration; but he is a devil in private
    brawl: souls and bodies hath he divorced three; and
    his incensement at this moment is so implacable,
    that satisfaction can be none but by pangs of death
    and sepulchre. Hob, nob, is his word; give't or take't.

125 III / 4
  • Sir, no; his indignation derives itself out of a
    very competent injury: ther...
  • Sir, no; his indignation derives itself out of a
    very competent injury: therefore, get you on and
    give him his desire. Back you shall not to the
    house, unless you undertake that with me which with
    as much safety you might answer him: therefore, on,
    or strip your sword stark naked; for meddle you
    must, that's certain, or forswear to wear iron about you.
  • Viola. I will return again into the house and desire some
    conduct of the lady. I am no fighter. I have heard
    of some kind of men that put quarrels purposely on
    others, to taste their valour: belike this is a man
    of that quirk.

    Sir Toby Belch. Sir, no; his indignation derives itself out of a
    very competent injury: therefore, get you on and
    give him his desire. Back you shall not to the
    house, unless you undertake that with me which with
    as much safety you might answer him: therefore, on,
    or strip your sword stark naked; for meddle you
    must, that's certain, or forswear to wear iron about you.

126 III / 4
  • I will do so. Signior Fabian, stay you by this
    gentleman till my return.
  • I will do so. Signior Fabian, stay you by this
    gentleman till my return.
  • Viola. This is as uncivil as strange. I beseech you, do me
    this courteous office, as to know of the knight what
    my offence to him is: it is something of my
    negligence, nothing of my purpose.

    Sir Toby Belch. I will do so. Signior Fabian, stay you by this
    gentleman till my return.

127 III / 4
  • Why, man, he's a very devil; I have not seen such a
    firago. I had a pass wit...
  • Why, man, he's a very devil; I have not seen such a
    firago. I had a pass with him, rapier, scabbard and
    all, and he gives me the stuck in with such a mortal
    motion, that it is inevitable; and on the answer, he
    pays you as surely as your feet hit the ground they
    step on. They say he has been fencer to the Sophy.
  • Viola. I shall be much bound to you for't: I am one that
    had rather go with sir priest than sir knight: I
    care not who knows so much of my mettle.

    Sir Toby Belch. Why, man, he's a very devil; I have not seen such a
    firago. I had a pass with him, rapier, scabbard and
    all, and he gives me the stuck in with such a mortal
    motion, that it is inevitable; and on the answer, he
    pays you as surely as your feet hit the ground they
    step on. They say he has been fencer to the Sophy.

128 III / 4
  • Ay, but he will not now be pacified: Fabian can
    scarce hold him yonder.
  • Ay, but he will not now be pacified: Fabian can
    scarce hold him yonder.
  • Sir Andrew Aguecheek. Pox on't, I'll not meddle with him.

    Sir Toby Belch. Ay, but he will not now be pacified: Fabian can
    scarce hold him yonder.

129 III / 4
  • I'll make the motion: stand here, make a good show
    on't: this shall end with...
  • I'll make the motion: stand here, make a good show
    on't: this shall end without the perdition of souls.
    [Aside]
    Marry, I'll ride your horse as well as I ride you.
    [Re-enter FABIAN and VIOLA]
    [To FABIAN]
    I have his horse to take up the quarrel:
    I have persuaded him the youth's a devil.
  • Sir Andrew Aguecheek. Plague on't, an I thought he had been valiant and so
    cunning in fence, I'ld have seen him damned ere I'ld
    have challenged him. Let him let the matter slip,
    and I'll give him my horse, grey Capilet.

    Sir Toby Belch. I'll make the motion: stand here, make a good show
    on't: this shall end without the perdition of souls.
    [Aside]
    Marry, I'll ride your horse as well as I ride you.
    [Re-enter FABIAN and VIOLA]
    [To FABIAN]
    I have his horse to take up the quarrel:
    I have persuaded him the youth's a devil.

130 III / 4
  • [To VIOLA] There's no remedy, sir; he will fight
    with you for's oath sake: m...
  • [To VIOLA] There's no remedy, sir; he will fight
    with you for's oath sake: marry, he hath better
    bethought him of his quarrel, and he finds that now
    scarce to be worth talking of: therefore draw, for
    the supportance of his vow; he protests he will not hurt you.
  • Fabian. He is as horribly conceited of him; and pants and
    looks pale, as if a bear were at his heels.

    Sir Toby Belch. [To VIOLA] There's no remedy, sir; he will fight
    with you for's oath sake: marry, he hath better
    bethought him of his quarrel, and he finds that now
    scarce to be worth talking of: therefore draw, for
    the supportance of his vow; he protests he will not hurt you.

131 III / 4
  • Come, Sir Andrew, there's no remedy; the gentleman
    will, for his honour's sa...
  • Come, Sir Andrew, there's no remedy; the gentleman
    will, for his honour's sake, have one bout with you;
    he cannot by the duello avoid it: but he has
    promised me, as he is a gentleman and a soldier, he
    will not hurt you. Come on; to't.
  • Fabian. Give ground, if you see him furious.

    Sir Toby Belch. Come, Sir Andrew, there's no remedy; the gentleman
    will, for his honour's sake, have one bout with you;
    he cannot by the duello avoid it: but he has
    promised me, as he is a gentleman and a soldier, he
    will not hurt you. Come on; to't.

132 III / 4
  • You, sir! why, what are you?
  • You, sir! why, what are you?
  • Antonio. Put up your sword. If this young gentleman
    Have done offence, I take the fault on me:
    If you offend him, I for him defy you.

    Sir Toby Belch. You, sir! why, what are you?

133 III / 4
  • Nay, if you be an undertaker, I am for you.
  • Nay, if you be an undertaker, I am for you.
  • Antonio. One, sir, that for his love dares yet do more
    Than you have heard him brag to you he will.

    Sir Toby Belch. Nay, if you be an undertaker, I am for you.

134 III / 4
  • I'll be with you anon.
  • I'll be with you anon.
  • Fabian. O good Sir Toby, hold! here come the officers.

    Sir Toby Belch. I'll be with you anon.

135 III / 4
  • Come hither, knight; come hither, Fabian: we'll
    whisper o'er a couplet or tw...
  • Come hither, knight; come hither, Fabian: we'll
    whisper o'er a couplet or two of most sage saws.
  • Viola. Methinks his words do from such passion fly,
    That he believes himself: so do not I.
    Prove true, imagination, O, prove true,
    That I, dear brother, be now ta'en for you!

    Sir Toby Belch. Come hither, knight; come hither, Fabian: we'll
    whisper o'er a couplet or two of most sage saws.

136 III / 4
  • A very dishonest paltry boy, and more a coward than
    a hare: his dishonesty a...
  • A very dishonest paltry boy, and more a coward than
    a hare: his dishonesty appears in leaving his
    friend here in necessity and denying him; and for
    his cowardship, ask Fabian.
  • Viola. He named Sebastian: I my brother know
    Yet living in my glass; even such and so
    In favour was my brother, and he went
    Still in this fashion, colour, ornament,
    For him I imitate: O, if it prove,
    Tempests are kind and salt waves fresh in love.

    Sir Toby Belch. A very dishonest paltry boy, and more a coward than
    a hare: his dishonesty appears in leaving his
    friend here in necessity and denying him; and for
    his cowardship, ask Fabian.

137 III / 4
  • Do; cuff him soundly, but never draw thy sword.
  • Do; cuff him soundly, but never draw thy sword.
  • Sir Andrew Aguecheek. 'Slid, I'll after him again and beat him.

    Sir Toby Belch. Do; cuff him soundly, but never draw thy sword.

138 III / 4
  • I dare lay any money 'twill be nothing yet.
  • I dare lay any money 'twill be nothing yet.
  • Fabian. Come, let's see the event.

    Sir Toby Belch. I dare lay any money 'twill be nothing yet.

139 IV / 1
  • Hold, sir, or I'll throw your dagger o'er the house.
  • Hold, sir, or I'll throw your dagger o'er the house.
  • Sebastian. Why, there's for thee, and there, and there. Are all
    the people mad?

    Sir Toby Belch. Hold, sir, or I'll throw your dagger o'er the house.

140 IV / 1
  • Come on, sir; hold.
  • Come on, sir; hold.
  • Feste. This will I tell my lady straight: I would not be
    in some of your coats for two pence.

    Sir Toby Belch. Come on, sir; hold.

141 IV / 1
  • Come, sir, I will not let you go. Come, my young
    soldier, put up your iron:...
  • Come, sir, I will not let you go. Come, my young
    soldier, put up your iron: you are well fleshed; come on.
  • Sebastian. Let go thy hand.

    Sir Toby Belch. Come, sir, I will not let you go. Come, my young
    soldier, put up your iron: you are well fleshed; come on.

142 IV / 1
  • What, what? Nay, then I must have an ounce or two
    of this malapert blood fro...
  • What, what? Nay, then I must have an ounce or two
    of this malapert blood from you.
  • Sebastian. I will be free from thee. What wouldst thou now? If
    thou darest tempt me further, draw thy sword.

    Sir Toby Belch. What, what? Nay, then I must have an ounce or two
    of this malapert blood from you.

143 IV / 1
  • Madam!
  • Madam!
  • Olivia. Hold, Toby; on thy life I charge thee, hold!

    Sir Toby Belch. Madam!

144 IV / 2
  • Jove bless thee, master Parson.
  • Jove bless thee, master Parson.
  • Feste. Well, I'll put it on, and I will dissemble myself
    in't; and I would I were the first that ever
    dissembled in such a gown. I am not tall enough to
    become the function well, nor lean enough to be
    thought a good student; but to be said an honest man
    and a good housekeeper goes as fairly as to say a
    careful man and a great scholar. The competitors enter.

    Sir Toby Belch. Jove bless thee, master Parson.

145 IV / 2
  • To him, Sir Topas.
  • To him, Sir Topas.
  • Feste. Bonos dies, Sir Toby: for, as the old hermit of
    Prague, that never saw pen and ink, very wittily
    said to a niece of King Gorboduc, 'That that is is;'
    so I, being Master Parson, am Master Parson; for,
    what is 'that' but 'that,' and 'is' but 'is'?

    Sir Toby Belch. To him, Sir Topas.

146 IV / 2
  • The knave counterfeits well; a good knave.
  • The knave counterfeits well; a good knave.
  • Feste. What, ho, I say! peace in this prison!

    Sir Toby Belch. The knave counterfeits well; a good knave.

147 IV / 2
  • Well said, Master Parson.
  • Well said, Master Parson.
  • Feste. Out, hyperbolical fiend! how vexest thou this man!
    talkest thou nothing but of ladies?

    Sir Toby Belch. Well said, Master Parson.

148 IV / 2
  • My most exquisite Sir Topas!
  • My most exquisite Sir Topas!
  • Malvolio. Sir Topas, Sir Topas!

    Sir Toby Belch. My most exquisite Sir Topas!

149 IV / 2
  • To him in thine own voice, and bring me word how
    thou findest him: I would w...
  • To him in thine own voice, and bring me word how
    thou findest him: I would we were well rid of this
    knavery. If he may be conveniently delivered, I
    would he were, for I am now so far in offence with
    my niece that I cannot pursue with any safety this
    sport to the upshot. Come by and by to my chamber.
  • Maria. Thou mightst have done this without thy beard and
    gown: he sees thee not.

    Sir Toby Belch. To him in thine own voice, and bring me word how
    thou findest him: I would we were well rid of this
    knavery. If he may be conveniently delivered, I
    would he were, for I am now so far in offence with
    my niece that I cannot pursue with any safety this
    sport to the upshot. Come by and by to my chamber.

150 V / 1
  • That's all one: has hurt me, and there's the end
    on't. Sot, didst see Dick s...
  • That's all one: has hurt me, and there's the end
    on't. Sot, didst see Dick surgeon, sot?
  • Orsino. How now, gentleman! how is't with you?

    Sir Toby Belch. That's all one: has hurt me, and there's the end
    on't. Sot, didst see Dick surgeon, sot?

151 V / 1
  • Then he's a rogue, and a passy measures panyn: I
    hate a drunken rogue.
  • Then he's a rogue, and a passy measures panyn: I
    hate a drunken rogue.
  • Feste. O, he's drunk, Sir Toby, an hour agone; his eyes
    were set at eight i' the morning.

    Sir Toby Belch. Then he's a rogue, and a passy measures panyn: I
    hate a drunken rogue.

152 V / 1
  • Will you help? an ass-head and a coxcomb and a
    knave, a thin-faced knave, a...
  • Will you help? an ass-head and a coxcomb and a
    knave, a thin-faced knave, a gull!
  • Sir Andrew Aguecheek. I'll help you, Sir Toby, because well be dressed together.

    Sir Toby Belch. Will you help? an ass-head and a coxcomb and a
    knave, a thin-faced knave, a gull!

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