Speeches (Lines) for Simple in "The Merry Wives of Windsor"

Slender. I had rather than forty shillings I had my Book of
Songs and Sonnets here.
[Enter SIMPLE]
How now, Simple! where have you been? I must wait
on myself, must I? You have not the Book of Riddles
about you, have you?

Simple. Book of Riddles! why, did you not lend it to Alice
Shortcake upon All-hallowmas last, a fortnight
afore Michaelmas?

Sir Hugh Evans. Go your ways, and ask of Doctor Caius' house which
is the way: and there dwells one Mistress Quickly,
which is in the manner of his nurse, or his dry
nurse, or his cook, or his laundry, his washer, and
his wringer.

Simple. Well, sir.

Mistress Quickly. Go; and we'll have a posset for't soon at night, in
faith, at the latter end of a sea-coal fire.
[Exit RUGBY]
An honest, willing, kind fellow, as ever servant
shall come in house withal, and, I warrant you, no
tell-tale nor no breed-bate: his worst fault is,
that he is given to prayer; he is something peevish
that way: but nobody but has his fault; but let
that pass. Peter Simple, you say your name is?

Simple. Ay, for fault of a better.

Mistress Quickly. And Master Slender's your master?

Simple. Ay, forsooth.

Mistress Quickly. Does he not wear a great round beard, like a
glover's paring-knife?

Simple. No, forsooth: he hath but a little wee face, with a
little yellow beard, a Cain-coloured beard.

Mistress Quickly. A softly-sprighted man, is he not?

Simple. Ay, forsooth: but he is as tall a man of his hands
as any is between this and his head; he hath fought
with a warrener.

Mistress Quickly. How say you? O, I should remember him: does he not
hold up his head, as it were, and strut in his gait?

Simple. Yes, indeed, does he.

Doctor Caius. Vell.

Simple. Ay, forsooth; to desire her to--

Doctor Caius. Peace-a your tongue. Speak-a your tale.

Simple. To desire this honest gentlewoman, your maid, to
speak a good word to Mistress Anne Page for my
master in the way of marriage.

Mistress Quickly. [Aside to SIMPLE] I am glad he is so quiet: if he
had been thoroughly moved, you should have heard him
so loud and so melancholy. But notwithstanding,
man, I'll do you your master what good I can: and
the very yea and the no is, the French doctor, my
master,--I may call him my master, look you, for I
keep his house; and I wash, wring, brew, bake,
scour, dress meat and drink, make the beds and do
all myself,--

Simple. [Aside to MISTRESS QUICKLY] 'Tis a great charge to
come under one body's hand.

Sir Hugh Evans. I pray you now, good master Slender's serving-man,
and friend Simple by your name, which way have you
looked for Master Caius, that calls himself doctor of physic?

Simple. Marry, sir, the pittie-ward, the park-ward, every
way; old Windsor way, and every way but the town
way.

Sir Hugh Evans. I most fehemently desire you you will also look that
way.

Simple. I will, sir.

Sir Hugh Evans. 'Pless my soul, how full of chollors I am, and
trempling of mind! I shall be glad if he have
deceived me. How melancholies I am! I will knog
his urinals about his knave's costard when I have
good opportunities for the ork. 'Pless my soul!
[Sings]
To shallow rivers, to whose falls
Melodious birds sings madrigals;
There will we make our peds of roses,
And a thousand fragrant posies.
To shallow--
Mercy on me! I have a great dispositions to cry.
[Sings]
Melodious birds sing madrigals--
When as I sat in Pabylon--
And a thousand vagram posies.
To shallow &c.

Simple. Yonder he is coming, this way, Sir Hugh.

Sir Hugh Evans. He's welcome.
[Sings]
To shallow rivers, to whose falls-
Heaven prosper the right! What weapons is he?

Simple. No weapons, sir. There comes my master, Master
Shallow, and another gentleman, from Frogmore, over
the stile, this way.

Host. What wouldst thou have, boor? what: thick-skin?
speak, breathe, discuss; brief, short, quick, snap.

Simple. Marry, sir, I come to speak with Sir John Falstaff
from Master Slender.

Host. There's his chamber, his house, his castle, his
standing-bed and truckle-bed; 'tis painted about
with the story of the Prodigal, fresh and new. Go
knock and call; hell speak like an Anthropophaginian
unto thee: knock, I say.

Simple. There's an old woman, a fat woman, gone up into his
chamber: I'll be so bold as stay, sir, till she come
down; I come to speak with her, indeed.

Falstaff. There was, mine host, an old fat woman even now with
me; but she's gone.

Simple. Pray you, sir, was't not the wise woman of
Brentford?

Falstaff. Ay, marry, was it, mussel-shell: what would you with her?

Simple. My master, sir, Master Slender, sent to her, seeing
her go through the streets, to know, sir, whether
one Nym, sir, that beguiled him of a chain, had the
chain or no.

Falstaff. I spake with the old woman about it.

Simple. And what says she, I pray, sir?

Falstaff. Marry, she says that the very same man that
beguiled Master Slender of his chain cozened him of
it.

Simple. I would I could have spoken with the woman herself;
I had other things to have spoken with her too from
him.

Host. Ay, come; quick.

Simple. I may not conceal them, sir.

Host. Conceal them, or thou diest.

Simple. Why, sir, they were nothing but about Mistress Anne
Page; to know if it were my master's fortune to
have her or no.

Falstaff. 'Tis, 'tis his fortune.

Simple. What, sir?

Falstaff. To have her, or no. Go; say the woman told me so.

Simple. May I be bold to say so, sir?

Falstaff. Ay, sir; like who more bold.

Simple. I thank your worship: I shall make my master glad
with these tidings.