Speeches (Lines) for Thurio in "The Two Gentlemen of Verona"

Valentine. Indeed, madam, I seem so.

Thurio. Seem you that you are not?

Valentine. Haply I do.

Thurio. So do counterfeits.

Valentine. So do you.

Thurio. What seem I that I am not?

Valentine. Wise.

Thurio. What instance of the contrary?

Valentine. Your folly.

Thurio. And how quote you my folly?

Valentine. I quote it in your jerkin.

Thurio. My jerkin is a doublet.

Valentine. Well, then, I'll double your folly.

Thurio. How?

Valentine. Give him leave, madam; he is a kind of chameleon.

Thurio. That hath more mind to feed on your blood than live
in your air.

Valentine. You have said, sir.

Thurio. Ay, sir, and done too, for this time.

Valentine. Yourself, sweet lady; for you gave the fire. Sir
Thurio borrows his wit from your ladyship's looks,
and spends what he borrows kindly in your company.

Thurio. Sir, if you spend word for word with me, I shall
make your wit bankrupt.

Valentine. Why, lady, Love hath twenty pair of eyes.

Thurio. They say that Love hath not an eye at all.

Proteus. That you are worthless.

Thurio. Madam, my lord your father would speak with you.

Duke of Milan. Sir Thurio, fear not but that she will love you,
Now Valentine is banish'd from her sight.

Thurio. Since his exile she hath despised me most,
Forsworn my company and rail'd at me,
That I am desperate of obtaining her.

Proteus. You have prevail'd, my lord; if I can do it
By ought that I can speak in his dispraise,
She shall not long continue love to him.
But say this weed her love from Valentine,
It follows not that she will love Sir Thurio.

Thurio. Therefore, as you unwind her love from him,
Lest it should ravel and be good to none,
You must provide to bottom it on me;
Which must be done by praising me as much
As you in worth dispraise Sir Valentine.

Duke of Milan. This discipline shows thou hast been in love.

Thurio. And thy advice this night I'll put in practise.
Therefore, sweet Proteus, my direction-giver,
Let us into the city presently
To sort some gentlemen well skill'd in music.
I have a sonnet that will serve the turn
To give the onset to thy good advice.

Proteus. Already have I been false to Valentine
And now I must be as unjust to Thurio.
Under the colour of commending him,
I have access my own love to prefer:
But Silvia is too fair, too true, too holy,
To be corrupted with my worthless gifts.
When I protest true loyalty to her,
She twits me with my falsehood to my friend;
When to her beauty I commend my vows,
She bids me think how I have been forsworn
In breaking faith with Julia whom I loved:
And notwithstanding all her sudden quips,
The least whereof would quell a lover's hope,
Yet, spaniel-like, the more she spurns my love,
The more it grows and fawneth on her still.
But here comes Thurio: now must we to her window,
And give some evening music to her ear.

Thurio. How now, Sir Proteus, are you crept before us?

Proteus. Ay, gentle Thurio: for you know that love
Will creep in service where it cannot go.

Thurio. Ay, but I hope, sir, that you love not here.

Proteus. Sir, but I do; or else I would be hence.

Thurio. Who? Silvia?

Proteus. Ay, Silvia; for your sake.

Thurio. I thank you for your own. Now, gentlemen,
Let's tune, and to it lustily awhile.

Proteus. Sir Thurio, fear not you: I will so plead
That you shall say my cunning drift excels.

Thurio. Where meet we?

Proteus. At Saint Gregory's well.

Thurio. Farewell.

Eglamour. Fear not: the forest is not three leagues off;
If we recover that, we are sure enough.

Thurio. Sir Proteus, what says Silvia to my suit?

Proteus. O, sir, I find her milder than she was;
And yet she takes exceptions at your person.

Thurio. What, that my leg is too long?

Proteus. No; that it is too little.

Thurio. I'll wear a boot, to make it somewhat rounder.

Julia. [Aside] But love will not be spurr'd to what
it loathes.

Thurio. What says she to my face?

Proteus. She says it is a fair one.

Thurio. Nay then, the wanton lies; my face is black.

Julia. [Aside] 'Tis true; such pearls as put out
ladies' eyes;
For I had rather wink than look on them.

Thurio. How likes she my discourse?

Proteus. Ill, when you talk of war.

Thurio. But well, when I discourse of love and peace?

Julia. [Aside] But better, indeed, when you hold your peace.

Thurio. What says she to my valour?

Julia. [Aside] She needs not, when she knows it cowardice.

Thurio. What says she to my birth?

Julia. [Aside] True; from a gentleman to a fool.

Thurio. Considers she my possessions?

Proteus. O, ay; and pities them.

Thurio. Wherefore?

Duke of Milan. How now, Sir Proteus! how now, Thurio!
Which of you saw Sir Eglamour of late?

Thurio. Not I.

Duke of Milan. Why then,
She's fled unto that peasant Valentine;
And Eglamour is in her company.
'Tis true; for Friar Laurence met them both,
As he in penance wander'd through the forest;
Him he knew well, and guess'd that it was she,
But, being mask'd, he was not sure of it;
Besides, she did intend confession
At Patrick's cell this even; and there she was not;
These likelihoods confirm her flight from hence.
Therefore, I pray you, stand not to discourse,
But mount you presently and meet with me
Upon the rising of the mountain-foot
That leads towards Mantua, whither they are fled:
Dispatch, sweet gentlemen, and follow me.

Thurio. Why, this it is to be a peevish girl,
That flies her fortune when it follows her.
I'll after, more to be revenged on Eglamour
Than for the love of reckless Silvia.

Duke of Milan. Sir Valentine!

Thurio. Yonder is Silvia; and Silvia's mine.

Valentine. Thurio, give back, or else embrace thy death;
Come not within the measure of my wrath;
Do not name Silvia thine; if once again,
Verona shall not hold thee. Here she stands;
Take but possession of her with a touch:
I dare thee but to breathe upon my love.

Thurio. Sir Valentine, I care not for her, I;
I hold him but a fool that will endanger
His body for a girl that loves him not:
I claim her not, and therefore she is thine.